Halloween is here again and nothing gets us in the mood better than a classic woodsy spooky movie. We love scary movies, from old-school psychological thrillers like Psycho to creepy hair-raising mind-tricks like Children of the Corn to the family of lunatics in Texas Chainsaw Massacre. In the spirit of the season, we bring you Five Great Woodsy Halloween movies to get you in the mood.
The direct sequel to 1999’s convention-defying shaky-cam original (Blair Witch Project) will have any rational theater-goer scratching their heads and silently willing the cast to not go into the woods. Sure enough, there’s bound to be something evil and menacing hiding in the Black Hills forest, and in this reprise, it’s Heather’s brother James who ventures into the woods. Tip: While we love the tranquility of the woods that we have in abundance here in Gold Bar, in Sultan, Index and Monroe, you may want to limit your spooky woodsy Halloween movie intake if you don’t want to get sketched out next time you go for a hike. But regardless of whether or not you venture out to Wallace Falls or just fill up a bowl sky-high with popcorn to scare yourself silly with scary flicks, first pamper yourself with some pot from Gold Bar Marijuana. Look at the Gold Bar Recreational Marijuana Menu first to get an idea before venturing out to this last stop pot shop.
Evil Dead II
Hello lover. 1987’s Evil Dead 2 is a beloved treasure that you should fire up at minimum once a year, especially at Halloween. It’s only proper. The tale of Bruce Campbell’s Ash Williams stay in the woods in this spoofy horror flick with girlfriend Linda (Denise Bixler) becoming possessed after a reading of The Book of the Dead. Once again, it’s man vs. nature and the woods always win. It’s so good it’ll make your cheeks hurt from laughing. Don’t just stream it, own this classic keeper.
The Cabin in the Woods
You’ll have a great time examining the stereotypical cabin-in-the-woods horror flick director Drew Goddard and co-writer Joss Wheldon serve up and cast well with stock characters playing the jock, stoner(!) , bad girl, virgin etc. and look at the two worlds side-by-side as the action unfolds and you see the group of kids being manipulated by puppeteers from an underground laboratory. Put on your cinema snob hat and enjoy being part of the master plan but just wait for the ending and report back if you can honestly say you saw it coming!
Fraught with tension, this home invasion thriller set in an isolated cabin in the woods in Alabama, which in itself, is creepy. There are not many things more frightening than being alone in the woods in the deep south. Checkmate: being alone in a remote cabin in the wilderness of Alabama with a deaf and mute female protagonist. When Kate Seigel’s portrayal of Maddie is taunted throughout by the masked bogey man, played by John Gallagher Jr., her lack of all five senses can be perceived as either a blessing or a curse. By the end of the flick, your perception of this will be altered. Directed by Mike Flanagan (Oculus).
Friday the 13th
This is the definitive scary movie that reshaped the way horror movies set in the woods are made. Think of how this flick has become a part of modern culture, from the hockey mask to attaching extra significance to bad luck when it strikes when the 13th of the month falls on a Friday. If Jason’s mother had only been a caring, nurturing matriarch who didn’t sell him out, we wouldn’t have a homicidal, chainsaw-wielding maniac on our hands, offing teenagers one by one as they innocently attempt to camp at Crystal Lake.
Set the tone for the season when you watch any of the Five Great Woodsy Halloween movies above. Enhancements and party favors are only a few miles away at Gold Bar’s only recreational weed shop, conveniently located on Route 2. We’ll leave the lights on for you.